In the Bible, betrothal refers to a formal agreement or promise between two individuals to marry, often involving legal and social commitments, as seen in the case of Joseph and Mary (Matthew 1:18-20). It signifies a period of engagement that is more binding than modern engagements, with potential consequences for infidelity.
Scripture
1 Now Abraham was old, well advanced in years. And the Lord had blessed Abraham in all things.
2 And Abraham said to his servant, the oldest of his household, who had charge of all that he had, “Put your hand under my thigh,
3 that I may make you swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and God of the earth, that you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell,
4 but will go to my country and to my kindred, and take a wife for my son Isaac.”
5 The servant said to him, “Perhaps the woman may not be willing to follow me to this land. Must I then take your son back to the land from which you came?”
6 And Abraham said to him, “See to it that you do not take my son back there.
7 The Lord, the God of heaven, who took me from my father’s house and from the land of my kindred, and who spoke to me and swore to me, ‘To your offspring I will give this land,’ he will send his angel before you, and you shall take a wife for my son from there.
8 If the woman is not willing to follow you, then you will be free from this oath of mine; only you must not take my son back there.”
9 So the servant put his hand under the thigh of Abraham his master and swore to him concerning this matter.
10 Then the servant took ten of his master’s camels and departed, taking all sorts of choice gifts from his master; and he arose and went to Mesopotamia to the city of Nahor.
11 And he made the camels kneel down outside the city by the well of water at the time of evening, the time when women go out to draw water.
12 And he said, “O Lord, God of my master Abraham, please grant me success today and show steadfast love to my master Abraham.
13 Behold, I am standing by the spring of water.
14 Let the young woman to whom I shall say, ‘Please let down your jar that I may drink,’ and who shall say, ‘Drink, and I will water your camels’—let her be the one whom you have appointed for your servant Isaac. By this I shall know that you have shown steadfast love to my master.”
15 Before he had finished speaking, behold, Rebekah, who was born to Bethuel the son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham’s brother, came out with her water jar on her shoulder.
16 The young woman was very attractive in appearance, a maiden whom no man had known.
17 The servant ran to meet her and said, “Please give me a little water to drink from your jar.”
18 She said, “Drink, my lord.” And she quickly let down her jar upon her hand and gave him a drink.
19 After she had given him a drink, she said, “I will draw water for your camels also, until they have finished drinking.”
20 and quickly emptied her jar into the trough and ran again to the well to draw water, and she drew for all his camels.
21 The man gazed at her in silence to learn whether the Lord had prospered his journey or not.
22 When the camels had finished drinking, the man took a gold ring weighing a half shekel, and two bracelets for her arms weighing ten gold shekels,
23 And said, “Whose daughter are you? Please tell me, is there room in your father’s house for us to spend the night?”
24 She said to him, “I am the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, whom she bore to Nahor.”
25 She added, “We have plenty of both straw and fodder, and room to spend the night.”
26 The man bowed his head and worshiped the Lord.
27 saying, “Blessed be the Lord, the God of my master Abraham, who has not forsaken his steadfast love and his faithfulness toward my master. As for me, the Lord has led me in the way to the house of my master’s kinsmen.”
28 The young woman ran and told her mother’s household about these things.
29 Rebekah had a brother whose name was Laban. Laban ran out toward the man, to the spring.
30 As soon as he had seen the ring and the bracelets on his sister’s arms, and heard the words of Rebekah his sister, “Thus the man spoke to me,” he went to the man. And behold, he was standing by the camels at the spring.
31 He said, “Come in, O blessed of the Lord. Why do you stand outside? For I have prepared the house and a place for the camels.”
32 So the man came to the house and unharnessed the camels, and gave straw and fodder to the camels, and there was water to wash his feet and the feet of the men who were with him.
33 Then food was set before him to eat, but he said, “I will not eat until I have said what I have to say.” So he said, “Speak on.”
34 So he said, “I am Abraham’s servant.
35 The Lord has greatly blessed my master, and he has become great. He has given him flocks and herds, silver and gold, male servants and female servants, camels and donkeys.
36 And Sarah my master’s wife bore a son to my master when she was old, and to him he has given all that he has.
37 My master made me swear, saying, ‘You shall not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, in whose land I dwell,
38 but you shall go to my father’s house and to my clan and take a wife for my son.’
39 I said to my master, ‘Perhaps the woman will not come with me.’
40 He said to me, ‘The Lord, before whom I have walked, will send his angel with you and prosper your way.
41 Then you will be free from my oath, when you come to my clan. And if they will not give her to you, you will be free from my oath.’
42 “I came today to the spring and said, ‘O Lord, the God of my master Abraham, if now you are prospering the way that I go,”
43 Behold, I am standing by the spring of water. Let the virgin who comes out to draw water, to whom I shall say, “Please give me a little water from your jar to drink,”
44 and she shall say to me, “Drink, and I will draw for your camels also,” let her be the woman whom the Lord has appointed for my master’s son.’
45 “Before I had finished speaking in my heart, behold, Rebekah came out with her water jar on her shoulder, and she went down to the spring and drew water. I said to her, ‘Please let me drink.’”
46 She quickly let down her jar from her shoulder and said, ‘Drink, and I will give your camels drink also.’ So I drank, and she gave the camels drink also.
47 Then I asked her, ‘Whose daughter are you?’ She said, ‘The daughter of Bethuel, Nahor’s son, whom Milcah bore to him.’ So I put the ring on her nose and the bracelets on her arms.
48 Then I bowed my head and worshiped the Lord and blessed the Lord, the God of my master Abraham, who had led me by the right way to take the daughter of my master’s kinsman for his son.
49 Now then, if you are going to show steadfast love and faithfulness to my master, tell me; and if not, tell me, that I may turn to the right hand or to the left.”
50 Then Laban and Bethuel answered and said, “The thing has come from the Lord; we cannot speak to you bad or good.
51 Behold, Rebekah is before you; take her and go, and let her be the wife of your master’s son, as the Lord has spoken.”
52 When Abraham’s servant heard their words, he bowed himself to the earth before the Lord.
53 And the servant brought out jewelry of silver and of gold, and garments, and gave them to Rebekah. He also gave to her brother and to her mother costly ornaments.
54 Then he and the men who were with him ate and drank and spent the night. When they arose in the morning, he said, “Send me away to my master.”
55 But her brother and her mother said, “Let the young woman remain with us a while, at least ten days; after that she may go.”
56 But he said to them, “Do not delay me, since the Lord has prospered my way. Send me away that I may go to my master.”
57 They said, “Let us call the young woman and ask her.”
58 And they called Rebekah and said to her, “Will you go with this man?” She said, “I will go.”
59 So they sent away Rebekah their sister and her nurse, and Abraham’s servant and his men.
24 They blessed Rebekah and said to her, “Our sister, may you become thousands of ten thousands, and may your offspring possess the gate of those who hate him!”
61 Then Rebekah and her young women arose and rode on the camels and followed the man. Thus the servant took Rebekah and went his way.
62 Now Isaac had returned from Beer-lahai-roi and was dwelling in the Negeb.
63 And Isaac went out to meditate in the field toward evening. And he lifted up his eyes and saw, and behold, there were camels coming.
64 And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she dismounted from the camel.
65 and said to the servant, “Who is that man, walking in the field to meet us?” The servant said, “It is my master.” So she took her veil and covered herself.
66 And the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done.
67 Then Isaac brought her into the tent of Sarah his mother and took Rebekah, and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.
Biblical Significance of Betrothal
The biblical concept of betrothal is rich in cultural and spiritual significance, serving as an important precursor to marriage that emphasizes commitment, fidelity, and divine purpose. In ancient Israel, betrothal was considered nearly equivalent to marriage itself, with the couple often referred to as husband and wife even before the consummation of the marriage. This is evident in Matthew 1:18-20, where Joseph learns of Mary’s pregnancy and contemplates a discreet divorce, highlighting the seriousness of the betrothal. The sacred nature of this commitment implies that breaking a betrothal, for example through infidelity, was seen not only as a personal betrayal but also as a transgression against societal and divine laws, underscoring the sanctity of marital unions.
The implications of betrothal extend beyond mere social contracts; they reflect profound theological truths about the covenant relationship between God and His people. Just as Israel is referred to as the betrothed of God (Hosea 2:19-20), believers today are called to remain faithful to their commitments in not only marriage but also to their relationship with Christ, who is likened to a bridegroom (Revelation 19:7). This mirrors the faithfulness expected in betrothal, emphasizing loyalty, trust, and preparation for a future together. Therefore, the biblical understanding of betrothal embodies a deeper spiritual narrative about covenantal love, responsibility, and the anticipation of ultimate unity, inviting individuals to honor their commitments in all relationships as a reflection of God’s unyielding faithfulness to His covenant promises.
Further exploring the biblical meaning of betrothal reveals its role as a symbol of preparation and anticipation, weaving together themes of waiting and expectation. In the ancient Near Eastern context, a betrothal often involved a period of engagement during which the couple would formally prepare for their marriage. This period can be likened to the spiritual journey of believers, who are also in a state of anticipation as they await the fulfillment of God’s promises. The prolonged nature of this betrothal echoes the biblical motif of waiting, where individuals and communities are called to maintain hope and faith in God’s timing, mirroring the expectant hope that accompanies the betrothal period.
Moreover, the betrothal also offers insights into the communal aspects of marriage. In biblical times, marriages were not solely individual unions, but rather communal celebrations that involved family and society at large. This collective engagement underscores the shared responsibility of upholding the vows made during the betrothal. The communal significance of such commitments can be seen in narratives throughout Scripture where kinship and community play pivotal roles in the lives of the couple. The importance of communal support and accountability reflects the idea that marriage and betrothal are not merely personal endeavors, but are enmeshed in the fabric of community life, serving as a reminder that these sacred promises reach far beyond the couple to encompass broader social and relational networks. This rich tapestry of meaning invites believers to recognize the depth of their vows and the grace of their journey towards unity with one another and with God.
The Covenant of Commitment
Betrothal in the Bible signifies a deep commitment between two individuals, often viewed as a covenant that goes beyond mere engagement. This period is marked by a promise of fidelity and loyalty, establishing a foundation for the future marriage. It reflects the seriousness of the relationship, where both parties are expected to honor their commitment, symbolizing a sacred bond that mirrors the covenant relationship between God and His people.
Spiritual Symbolism of Union
Betrothal also carries significant spiritual symbolism, representing the relationship between Christ and the Church. This period of betrothal can be seen as a time of preparation and sanctification, where believers are called to grow in faith and holiness in anticipation of the ultimate union with Christ. The betrothal period emphasizes the importance of spiritual readiness and the transformative journey that leads to a deeper relationship with God.
Cultural and Social Implications
In biblical times, betrothal was not merely a personal commitment but also a social contract that involved families and communities. It served to strengthen familial ties and social alliances, highlighting the communal aspect of marriage. This broader meaning underscores the importance of relationships within the community and the role of family in the establishment of a new household, reflecting the interconnectedness of individual choices and communal responsibilities in biblical society.
How to Strengthen Your Commitment to God and Others
Strengthening your commitment to God and others is a beautiful journey that begins with intentionality and prayer. Start by carving out dedicated time each day to connect with God through scripture and reflection; this not only deepens your understanding of His love but also equips you to share that love with those around you. Consider how you can serve your community—whether through volunteering, offering a listening ear, or simply being present for someone in need. Remember, commitment is not just about grand gestures; it’s often found in the small, everyday acts of kindness and patience. Surround yourself with fellow believers who inspire you and hold you accountable, and don’t hesitate to share your struggles and victories with them. As you cultivate this commitment, you’ll find that your faith grows stronger, and your relationships with others flourish, reflecting the love of Christ in all you do.
Bible References to Betrothal Significance:
Exodus 22:16-17: 16 “If a man seduces a virgin who is not betrothed and lies with her, he shall give the bride-price for her and make her his wife.
17 You shall not permit a sorceress to live.
Deuteronomy 20:7: 7 And is there any man who has betrothed a wife and has not taken her? Let him go back to his house, lest he die in the battle and another man take her.’
Deuteronomy 22:23-24: 23 “If there is a betrothed virgin, and a man meets her in the city and lies with her,
24 then you shall bring them both out to the gate of that city, and you shall stone them to death with stones, the young woman because she did not cry for help though she was in the city, and the man because he violated his neighbor’s wife. So you shall purge the evil from your midst.
Deuteronomy 28:30: 30 You shall betroth a wife, but another man shall ravish her.
Judges 14:1-20: 1 Samson went down to Timnah, and at Timnah he saw one of the daughters of the Philistines.
2 Then he came up and told his father and mother, “I saw one of the daughters of the Philistines at Timnah. Now get her for me as my wife.”
3 But his father and mother said to him, “Is there not a woman among the daughters of your relatives, or among all our people, that you must go to take a wife from the uncircumcised Philistines?” But Samson said to his father, “Get her for me, for she is right in my eyes.”
4 His father and mother did not know that it was from the Lord, for he was seeking an opportunity against the Philistines. At that time the Philistines ruled over Israel.
5 Then Samson went down with his father and mother to Timnah, and they came to the vineyards of Timnah. And behold, a young lion came toward him roaring.
6 Then the Spirit of the Lord rushed upon him, and although he had nothing in his hand, he tore the lion in pieces as one tears a young goat. But he did not tell his father or his mother what he had done.
7 Then he went down and talked with the woman, and she was right in Samson’s eyes.
8 After some days he returned to take her. And he turned aside to see the carcass of the lion, and behold, there was a swarm of bees in the body of the lion, and honey.
9 He scraped it out into his hands and went on, eating as he went. And he came to his father and mother and gave some to them, and they ate.
10 His father went down to the woman, and Samson prepared a feast there, for so the young men used to do.
11 And when the people saw him, they praised their god. For they said, “Our god has given our enemy into our hand, the ravager of our country, who has killed many of us.”
12 And Samson said to them, “Let me now put a riddle to you. If you can tell me what it is, within the seven days of the feast, and find it out, then I will give you thirty linen garments and thirty changes of clothes,
13 But if you cannot tell me what it is, then you shall give me thirty linen garments and thirty changes of clothes.” And they said to him, “Put your riddle, that we may hear it.”
14 And he said to them, “Out of the eater came something to eat. Out of the strong came something sweet.” And in three days they could not solve the riddle.
15 On the fourth day they said to Samson’s wife, “Entice your husband to tell us what the riddle is, lest we burn you and your father’s house with fire. Have you invited us here to impoverish us?”
16 And Samson’s wife wept over him and said, “You only hate me; you do not love me. You have put a riddle to my people, and you have not told me what it is.”
17 She wept before him the seven days that their feast lasted, and on the seventh day he told her, because she pressed him hard. Then she told the riddle to her people.
18 And the men of the city said to him on the seventh day before the sun went down, “What is sweeter than honey? What is stronger than a lion?” And he said to them, “If you had not plowed with my heifer, you would not have found out my riddle.”
19 And the Spirit of the Lord rushed upon him, and he went down to Ashkelon and struck down thirty men of the town and took their spoil and gave the garments to those who had told the riddle. In hot anger he went back to his father’s house.
20 And Samson’s wife was given to his companion, who had been his best man.
1 Samuel 18:17-27: 17 Then Saul said to David, “Here is my elder daughter Merab. I will give her to you for a wife. Only be valiant for me and fight the Lord’s battles.” For Saul thought, “Let not my hand be against him, but let the hand of the Philistines be against him.”
18 Then David said to Saul, “Who am I, and what is my life or my father’s family in Israel, that I should be son-in-law to the king?”
19 But at the time when Merab, Saul’s daughter, should have been given to David, she was given to Adriel the Meholathite for a wife.
20 Now Saul’s daughter Michal loved David. And they told Saul, and the thing pleased him.
21 Saul thought, “I will give her to him, that she may be a snare for him and that the hand of the Philistines may be against him.” Therefore Saul said to David a second time, “You shall now be my son-in-law.”
22 And Saul commanded his servants, “Speak to David in private and say, ‘Behold, the king has delight in you, and all his servants love you. Now then become the king’s son-in-law.’”
23 And Saul’s servants spoke those words in the ears of David. And David said, “Does it seem to you a little thing to become the king’s son-in-law, since I am a poor man and have no reputation?”
24 And the servants of Saul told him, “Thus and so did David speak.”
25 Then Saul said, “Thus shall you say to David, ‘The king desires no bride-price except a hundred foreskins of the Philistines, that he may be avenged of the king’s enemies.’” Now Saul thought to make David fall by the hand of the Philistines.
26 And when his servants told David these words, it pleased David well to be the king’s son-in-law.
27 David arose and went, along with his men, and killed two hundred of the Philistines. And David brought their foreskins, which were given in full number to the king, that he might become the king’s son-in-law. And Saul gave him his daughter Michal for a wife.
2 Samuel 3:14-16: 14 Then David sent messengers to Ish-bosheth, Saul’s son, saying, “Give me my wife Michal, for whom I paid the bridal price of a hundred foreskins of the Philistines.”
15 And Ish-bosheth sent and took her from her husband Paltiel the son of Laish.
16 And her husband went with her, weeping after her all the way to Bahurim. Then Abner said to him, “Go, return.” And he returned.
Hosea 2:19-20: 19 And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy.
20 I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the Lord.
Matthew 1:18-25: 18 Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit.
19 And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly.
20 But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.
21 She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.
22 All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet:
23 “Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us).
24 When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him: he took his wife,
25 but knew her not until she had given birth to a son. And he called his name Jesus.
Luke 1:26-38: 26 In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth,
27 to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. And the virgin’s name was Mary.
28 And he came to her and said, “Greetings, O favored one, the Lord is with you!”
29 But she was greatly troubled at the saying, and tried to discern what sort of greeting this might be.
30 And the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God.
31 And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus.
32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. And the Lord God will give to him the throne of his father David,
33 and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end.”
34 And Mary said to the angel, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?”
35 And the angel answered her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be called holy—the Son of God.
36 And behold, your relative Elizabeth in her old age has also conceived a son, and this is the sixth month with her who was called barren.
37 For nothing will be impossible with God.
38 And Mary said, “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her.
Luke 2:1-7: 2 In those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be registered.
2 This was the first registration when Quirinius was governor of Syria.
3 And all went to be registered, each to his own town.
4 And Joseph also went up from Galilee, from the town of Nazareth, to Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and lineage of David,
5 to be registered with Mary, his betrothed, who was with child.
6 And while they were there, the time came for her to give birth.
7 And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn.
Rev. François Dupont is a dedicated church minister with a wealth of experience in serving spiritual communities. With a calm and serene demeanor, he has been devoted to sharing the message of love, compassion, and tolerance for over two decades. Through his thoughtful sermons, compassionate counseling, and unwavering support, Rev. Dupont has touched the lives of countless individuals, allowing them to find solace and strength during difficult times. His serene presence and deep understanding of the human condition make him a trusted guide for those seeking spiritual nourishment and guidance.