What the Bible Says About Wives Submitting: Understanding the Meaning and Context

In scripture, the phrase “wives submit” primarily comes from Ephesians 5:22-24, which instructs wives to submit to their husbands as the church submits to Christ. This concept emphasizes a voluntary and respectful partnership within the marriage, reflecting an order of roles rather than inferiority.

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Scripture

22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.
24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

Ephesians 5:22-24

Wives Submit: Biblical Meaning Explained

The idea of wives submitting to their husbands in scripture, particularly in Ephesians 5:22-24, must be understood within the broader context of mutual respect and love that characterizes the Christian marital relationship. In this passage, the Apostle Paul writes, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord,” highlighting a structured relationship that mirrors the church’s submission to Christ. However, the surrounding texts reveal a reciprocal dynamic; Ephesians 5:25 instructs husbands to “love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This illustrates that the submission encouraged in wives is not about subjugation but rather about partnership within a framework of love, sacrifice, and commitment.

Additionally, understanding the cultural and historical context of the time is vital. In the Greco-Roman world, hierarchical relationships were common, yet Paul introduces a radical concept of love and sacrifice that elevates the status of women by calling for a mutual submission (Ephesians 5:21) within the household. This echoes the broader biblical narrative found in Genesis 2:18-24, where the creation of woman is presented as a complementary relationship, reinforcing that both spouses are essential and valued. Thus, the call to submission is rooted in mutual dignity, a reflection of Christ’s love, and designed for the flourishing of the marital bond rather than oppression or domination.

The biblical concept of submission within marriage extends beyond isolated verses, as it is echoed throughout both the Old and New Testaments, calling for an understanding that balances authority with mutual support. In 1 Peter 3:1-7, for instance, the apostle emphasizes a wife’s respectful conduct as a means of influence within the marriage, even if the husband is disobedient to the word. Here, submission is portrayed not merely as obedience, but as a demonstration of faith and character that can lead to transformative outcomes in relationships. This passage articulates an understanding of submission that empowers women, inviting them to embody a gracious spirit, thereby reinforcing the idea that the dynamic between husbands and wives should reflect Christ-like qualities of patience, understanding, and love.

Moreover, the relational dynamics illustrated in Colossians 3:18-19 reiterate a theme of partnership by instructing wives to submit to their husbands while also calling husbands to love their wives and avoid harshness. This mutual emphasis reflects the belief that both roles within marriage have a purpose designed to cultivate harmony and emotional well-being. The integration of submission and love creates a balanced relationship, where each spouse contributes uniquely to the unity of the family. In this light, scriptural references to wives submitting encompass a broader theology that recognizes the beauty of shared purpose and the need for both spouses to engage in a committed, loving dialogue that nurtures their relationship, fostering both individual growth and communal faith.

The Concept of Mutual Respect and Love

In the biblical context, the idea of wives submitting to their husbands is often intertwined with the broader principle of mutual respect and love within the marriage relationship. This submission is not about inferiority or oppression but rather about creating a harmonious partnership where both spouses honor and value each other. The emphasis is on love and respect, suggesting that both partners should strive to uplift one another, fostering an environment where both can thrive spiritually and emotionally.

The Role of Leadership and Responsibility

Another significant aspect of the concept of submission is the role of leadership and responsibility within the family structure. In many biblical interpretations, the husband is seen as the leader of the household, tasked with providing guidance and protection. This leadership role comes with the responsibility to love and care for the family, reflecting a Christ-like love that prioritizes the well-being of the wife and children. Thus, submission can be viewed as a response to this leadership, where the wife supports her husband’s role while also contributing her own strengths and insights to the family dynamic.

The Spiritual Dimension of Submission

Submission in the biblical sense also carries a spiritual dimension, emphasizing the importance of aligning oneself with God’s design for marriage. This perspective suggests that when both partners embrace their roles—husbands loving sacrificially and wives submitting willingly—they reflect the relationship between Christ and the Church. This spiritual alignment fosters a deeper connection not only between the spouses but also with God, encouraging both to grow in faith and commitment to one another.

How to Foster Love and Respect in Christian Marriage

Fostering love and respect in a Christian marriage is a beautiful journey that requires intentionality and grace. Start by prioritizing open and honest communication; share your thoughts and feelings with your spouse, and listen actively to theirs. Remember, Ephesians 5:33 reminds us that each husband should love his wife as himself, and each wife should respect her husband. This mutual love and respect create a safe space where both partners can thrive. Make it a habit to express gratitude for one another, whether through small gestures or heartfelt words, as these acts reinforce your bond. Additionally, pray together regularly, inviting God into your relationship, which not only strengthens your connection but also aligns your hearts with His purpose. Embrace the challenges as opportunities for growth, and always strive to reflect Christ’s love in your actions, knowing that a marriage rooted in faith can weather any storm.

Bible References to Wives Submit in Scripture:

Colossians 3:18-19: 18 Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
19 Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.

1 Peter 3:1-6: 3 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives,
3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—
3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—
3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—
5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands,
6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

Titus 2:3-5: 3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good,
4 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children,
5 to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.

1 Corinthians 11:3-12: 3 But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.
4 Every man who prays or prophesies with his head covered dishonors his head,
5 but every wife who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head, since it is the same as if her head were shaven.
6 For if a wife will not cover her head, then she should cut her hair short. But since it is disgraceful for a wife to cut off her hair or shave her head, let her cover her head.
7 For a man ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God, but woman is the glory of man.
8 For man was not made from woman, but woman from man.
9 Neither was man created for woman, but woman for man.
10 That is why a wife ought to have a symbol of authority on her head, because of the angels.
11 Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man nor man of woman;
12 For as woman was made from man, so man is now born of woman. And all things are from God.

Genesis 3:16-19: 16 To the woman he said, “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.”
17 And to Adam he said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, ‘You shall not eat of it,’ cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life;
18 thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field.
19 By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return.

Proverbs 31:10-31: 10 An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant;
she brings her food from afar.
15 She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She dresses herself with strength
and makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She puts her hands to the distaff,
and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poor
and reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes bed coverings for herself;
her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
and she laughs at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women have done excellently,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
and let her works praise her in the gates.

1 Timothy 2:11-15: 11 Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness.
12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet.
13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve.
14 and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.
15 Yet she will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith and love and holiness, with self-control.

1 Corinthians 14:34-35: 34 the women should keep silent in the churches. For they are not permitted to speak, but should be in submission, as the Law also says.
35 If there is anything they desire to learn, let them ask their husbands at home. For it is shameful for a woman to speak in church.