What the Bible Says About Love: Seeketh Not Her Own

The phrase “seeketh not her own” refers to selflessness and the willingness to prioritize the needs and wellbeing of others over one’s own desires. It is commonly associated with 1 Corinthians 13:5, which describes love as not being self-seeking, emphasizing the importance of putting others first in relationships and community.

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Scripture

4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant
5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;
6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.
7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Seeketh Not Her Own” in the Bible

The phrase “seeketh not her own,” as found in 1 Corinthians 13:5, highlights a profound theological and ethical principle that runs throughout the Bible: the call to selflessness and agape love. This kind of love is characterized by its unconditional nature, which reflects God’s love for humanity. By stating that love does not seek its own interests, Paul emphasizes a transformative community ethos where individuals are encouraged to prioritize the needs of others. This aligns with Jesus’ teachings in Mark 12:31, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself,” and perfectly captures the essence of true Christian fellowship, which is fundamentally about mutual care and support.

Moreover, this principle extends beyond individual relationships to encompass the broader Christian witness in society. In Philippians 2:3-4, Paul writes, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Here, the call to selflessness is grounded in humility and community life, inviting believers to engage in acts of service and advocacy for the marginalized. Overall, “seeketh not her own” serves as a radical counter-narrative to a self-centered society, calling Christians to live out their faith in ways that embody the love and grace of Christ, ultimately reflecting the heart of the Gospel.

The idea of not seeking one’s own interests resonates throughout Scripture, illustrating the significance of community and collective well-being over individual desires. In Romans 15:1-2, for instance, Paul emphasizes the imperative of bearing with the weaknesses of the weak, urging believers to please their neighbors for their good and building them up. This notion reinforces the understanding that true community is fostered through acts of kindness and support, where one’s actions are directed toward the benefit of others rather than personal gain. Such exhortations encourage believers to engage in mutual edification, fostering a spirit of unity reflective of the body of Christ, where each member is valuable and has a role to play.

Additionally, the theme of selflessness can be further observed in the teachings of Jesus, who exemplifies this principle throughout His ministry. His actions, such as washing the feet of His disciples (John 13:1-17), serve as a powerful metaphor for servant leadership and humility. In doing so, Jesus challenges societal norms that privilege power and status, instead demonstrating that greatness in the Kingdom of God is found in serving others. The commitment to seek the welfare of others, therefore, is consistently portrayed as a hallmark of true discipleship, calling believers to a lifestyle marked by sacrifice, generosity, and love that transcends self-interest. This foundational concept remains crucial in shaping a Christ-centered community, guiding individuals to embody the essence of divine love in all interactions.

Selflessness in Relationships

The phrase “seeketh not her own” emphasizes the importance of selflessness in relationships, particularly in the context of love and community. It suggests that true love prioritizes the needs and well-being of others over personal desires or interests. This principle encourages individuals to cultivate a spirit of generosity and empathy, fostering deeper connections and harmony within families, friendships, and congregations.

The Call to Serve Others

In a broader biblical context, “seeketh not her own” reflects the call to serve others rather than oneself. This idea is prevalent throughout scripture, where believers are encouraged to act in service to one another, reflecting the character of Christ. By putting others first, individuals embody the teachings of humility and sacrifice, which are central to the Christian faith, ultimately leading to a more compassionate and supportive community.

The Pursuit of Unity

Another significant meaning of “seeketh not her own” relates to the pursuit of unity within the body of believers. This concept underscores the importance of collective well-being over individual ambitions. When individuals prioritize the common good and the interests of the community, it fosters an environment of cooperation and love, which is essential for spiritual growth and the fulfillment of God’s purpose for His people.

How to Cultivate Selflessness in Christian Relationships

Cultivating selflessness in our Christian relationships is a beautiful journey that reflects the heart of Christ. Start by intentionally putting others’ needs before your own; this could be as simple as listening more than you speak or offering help without expecting anything in return. Remember, selflessness is rooted in love, so immerse yourself in prayer, asking God to soften your heart and open your eyes to the needs around you. Engage in acts of service, whether it’s volunteering in your community or simply checking in on a friend who may be struggling. As you practice these acts, you’ll find that selflessness not only strengthens your relationships but also deepens your faith, allowing you to experience the joy that comes from living out the commandment to love one another as Christ loves us. Embrace this journey with grace, knowing that it’s a process, and every small step counts in reflecting God’s love to those around you.

Bible References to “Seeketh Not Her Own”:

Philippians 2:3-4: 3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Romans 12:9-13: Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good.
10 Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.
11 Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord.
12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.
13 Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.

Matthew 6:31-33: 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’
32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all.
33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

1 John 3:16-18: 16 By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.
17 But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?
18 Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.

Galatians 5:13-14: 13 For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.
14 For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

Luke 6:27-31: 27 “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.
29 To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either.
30 Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back.
31 And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.

John 15:12-13: 12 “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.”
13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.

Romans 15:1-3: 1 We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak, and not to please ourselves.
2 Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up.
3 For Christ did not please himself, but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached you fell on me.”

1 Peter 4:8-10: 8 Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.
Show hospitality to one another without grumbling.
10 As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace:

Colossians 3:12-14: 12 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience,
13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.
14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

Ephesians 4:1-3: I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called,
2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love,
3 eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

James 3:13-18: 13 Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom.
14 But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth.
15 This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic.
16 For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.
17 But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.
18 And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

1 Thessalonians 5:14-15: 14 And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.
15 See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone.

Hebrews 13:1-3: Let brotherly love continue.
2 Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.
3 Remember those who are in prison, as though in prison with them, and those who are mistreated, since you also are in the body.